Happy Birthday, Honey.
Tommy turned 40. He’s older than me, so don’t worry, I’m still quite young.
I made him wear this special birthday shirt!
And our family’s traditional birthday crown. Everyone wears it on their birthday. It’s very itchy, so you never forget you have it on.
He is usually pretty low key about his birthday. I think years of having a December birthday have lowered his expectations on getting gifts for his birthday not wrapped in Christmas paper, having people show up to celebrate between holiday parties and finals, and just generally having people stop and give his birthday their full attention. December birthdays are hard.
But this year was a bit different - he started talking about his birthday, hoping for lots of surprises, attention and celebration. He doesn’t seem too fazed by the aging aspect of entering his forties, but the milestone birthday I think felt like it should be properly acknowledged. And with a pandemic, God knows we need celebrations and joy. But it’s not easy to plan a Covid-safe birthday that feels fun for someone who doesn’t want any big gifts and who mostly likes to travel and attend live sporting events.
One thing to know about Tommy is that he loves surprises and will go to great lengths to completely surprise someone else. I was working within some limitations with Covid (no big party this year), but I did want to deliver a few surprises. I managed to achieve three -
Sprinkles cupcakes at Primrose for all the staff
“Holy (poop emoji), You’re Forty” toilet paper in our bathroom
Gifts he didn’t ask for, but will use! He’s very hard to shop for.
Those gifts were wrapped in personalized paper. Which I find very funny…
We started our day off by sleeping in, enjoying our girls’ unique ability to care for themselves and Theo in the morning. They eat breakfast (frozen waffles) and watch iPad, but they are happy and we get to sleep to the late, late hour of 8 AM. It’s really something, and the girls are such sweet big sisters, getting Theo out of bed, downstairs, in his high chair, and eating breakfast. They seem to love the company and independence, and we definitely love the extra sleep. We are usually awake just enjoying waking up slowly instead of leaping out of bed to deal with the hungry toddler every morning. If you have older kids and a toddler, highly recommend this setup.
We had some family snuggles when the kids came to hop in our bed, then Tommy hopped on the Peloton for a ride while I got breakfast ready. He requested French Toast and scrambled eggs. We ate breakfast together, which was sweet. A nice chance to be together as a family, and as I was getting breakfast ready, Ruthie said, “Daddy is the glue that holds our family together. I love him!” I mean, how can you not melt, and also be proud to have that person as your partner. He didn’t hear it, and I forgot to tell him (oops) so he will read this and find out how Ruthie sees him.
After breakfast, he watched a cameo from my mom that she set up with Vince Young. A Longhorn cameo from his college days - he was grinning from ear to ear. Another surprise, although not mine.
We cleaned up, got ourselves put together, and set up a Covid-style mini-party. Socially-distanced in the backyard with each of the two other families at their own table to have lunch. Tommy’s parents joined us too. But you know, it was fun to be together, even a little far apart-version of together. I hung a banner outside, and put out a few beers and ciders in an ice bucket. Boom - Covid-safe party! Tommy is a great friend, and one who keeps his relationships for a long time because he is loyal and keeps in touch with people. Our friends who came over were friends of his from high school, with their spouses, who are also now our friends.
After lunch, Tommy took a nap, the girls relaxed with their iPads, and Theo followed me around while I cleaned. We had Salt Traders for dinner, and then packed the kids off to bed a little early. I had scheduled an online trivia game with TriviaHub. It was cool because people from all over the country, as well as Tommy’s friend who lives in South Africa joined us. Friends from high school, college, young adult life, and now. After trivia, we hung out and chatted for a little while and played a few more games of Jackbox games.
In the end, I can see that so many of the things I love about Tommy are part of the day, and I think he did feel loved and celebrated with a day that didn’t mention Christmas once.
We aren’t much for public, social media messages about how great the other person is, so I don’t usually write anything for his birthday publicly. This year, in the planning of his birthday, I actually forgot to get him a card. I do love him very much, and so here’s his public shoutout of love.
He’s a great father and a great husband, which we got to celebrate during breakfast. A loyal friend who loves to have fun, easygoing most of the time, loves good food. He loves to compete and was a good sport even though his team lost on his birthday. He is like glue - holding our family together with his consistent, unconditional love and holding his friends together over space and time and continents. We are lucky to have him. Happy birthday honey!